... and into the Light

Thursday, January 20, 2005

Today Becca would have been 31.

I wish I had a scanner so I could post a picture of her. She was so beatiful and she was my best friend. Actually, she was the female equivelant of my soul mate. I used to laugh when she said that but thinking back it is the only thing that makes sense now. With no one else have I been so in tune with, we would know what the other was thinking even when we were 3 hours apart and there was no way I could lie to her.

The first time I had sex she called me at 9am the next morning and asked me if I was OK. It was a one night stand and she instantly knew. I told her I was fine but I think she knew I was going to be hurting and regret it later.

I knew that she really loved her husband but was not happy in the marriage, she was only with him for the security it provided her daughter while Bec was sick and when I asked her about it she cried and asked why we even bothered keeping secrets from eachother.

Becca was the strongest, kindest, most giving person I knew. She sacrificed everything for her daughter and her family and it cost her her life. The beautiful part is that now I have a guardian angel watching over me, she won't tell me how to live my life, or lead me down a specific path, she'll just hold my hand along the way and remind me that she's there whenenver I need her.

I miss you, Becca.
And Thanks for showing me how beautiful Life can be.
Dragonfly 1/20/2005 12:29:00 PM

4 Comments:

I didn't think today would be as hard as it was. Every other year I have taken this day in stride and not thought of how much I miss her. Today I cried too many times to count. I guess it has something to do with my need for guidance right now... and her ability to read my mind and tell me what I really am thinking!
It wasn't too bad though.

Em and I went out and I found a Raptors shirt to wear on Sunday and I picked up a Birthday card for my Brother and my Mom! So it wasn't a complete wrote off.
Why the comment on your own post? What a lovely tribute to your friend. I really liked it. Hope George is feeling better. Where is Firefly?
I didn't feel like editing...
I wasn't in a good frame of mind.

Firefly is preoccupied.
Wow - the Blog finally let me in!!! yeah!!

Firefly:
I never expect you to fill Bec's shoes, or take her place. You are one of the few people in my life now that knew me when I knew her before she got sick - so the real US!!!

You and I have a different and altogether special friendship that could never be replaced. Just like the friendship that Bec and I had.

I cherish the friendships I have with each and every one of my friends and I would never replace any of them...
I am grateful for everyday I got to spend with Bec and the beauty she brought into the world - just as I am grateful for each and every day that I get to spend with you... and Em, and Sarah, and Caron and Dea and Lee... (I hope I didn't forget anyone!)

And yes Vegas - I enjoy every conversation I have with my new friends too!

It doesn't matter what you say, just that you say something.

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