Saturday, March 03, 2007
A little bit of this - A little Bit of that
It’s a little demeaning being reliant on others to make decisions.
I went into a hypo-manic phase. I’m not allowed to say manic cause there’s a difference and I am not manic - just really hyper and having other symptoms.
So hypo it is.
And well…
Being told by the doctor and the therapist that I am not allowed to drive and I have to relinquish my bank and credit cards to a friend that I trust is not easy.
I had to have a friend take me shopping yesterday because I had an approved list by the therapist. She even signed it - cause that was the promise made.
I don’t feel like a little kid - I just feel like I am incapable of properly looking after myself - which is in actuality quite true.
I am having an interesting time sleeping - Thursday night I slept for 5 hours in a row - it was awesome - last night - not so much.
The good thing about being hypo-manic is that I really don’t’ need the sleep anyway - I can go like the energizer bunny - ah - good times. Sure I take power naps, but - I can live without them.
My therapist told me that I am to relax, stay out of stores unless accompanied by a friend and am shopping from my approved list (no impulse purchases) and find things that amuse me without getting me too worked up.
I figured out I can read if I have my iPod on - that’s cool. I’ve been lacking the concentration to read lately. And I love to read.
I am not allowed to drive to Toronto and help Phoenix out with her move - that saddens me. But the concern is the danger I impose to myself and others while driving - I have lead foot syndrome - and I have no “impulse” control - also easily distracted. Driving for an hour or more is too much…. Sorry Phoenix.
I could have a great time if I had my cards and my car (I’m just being good about not driving, that’s all.)
And I did it.
I went for my physical Friday Morning, and I asked about getting my tubes tied as a permanent birth control method because of the bipolar. I see a gynocologist on the 13th. Quicker than I thought - but that could be for the best.
I went into a hypo-manic phase. I’m not allowed to say manic cause there’s a difference and I am not manic - just really hyper and having other symptoms.
So hypo it is.
And well…
Being told by the doctor and the therapist that I am not allowed to drive and I have to relinquish my bank and credit cards to a friend that I trust is not easy.
I had to have a friend take me shopping yesterday because I had an approved list by the therapist. She even signed it - cause that was the promise made.
I don’t feel like a little kid - I just feel like I am incapable of properly looking after myself - which is in actuality quite true.
I am having an interesting time sleeping - Thursday night I slept for 5 hours in a row - it was awesome - last night - not so much.
The good thing about being hypo-manic is that I really don’t’ need the sleep anyway - I can go like the energizer bunny - ah - good times. Sure I take power naps, but - I can live without them.
My therapist told me that I am to relax, stay out of stores unless accompanied by a friend and am shopping from my approved list (no impulse purchases) and find things that amuse me without getting me too worked up.
I figured out I can read if I have my iPod on - that’s cool. I’ve been lacking the concentration to read lately. And I love to read.
I am not allowed to drive to Toronto and help Phoenix out with her move - that saddens me. But the concern is the danger I impose to myself and others while driving - I have lead foot syndrome - and I have no “impulse” control - also easily distracted. Driving for an hour or more is too much…. Sorry Phoenix.
I could have a great time if I had my cards and my car (I’m just being good about not driving, that’s all.)
And I did it.
I went for my physical Friday Morning, and I asked about getting my tubes tied as a permanent birth control method because of the bipolar. I see a gynocologist on the 13th. Quicker than I thought - but that could be for the best.
Labels: bipolar, friends, hypo-manic, shopping
Dragonfly 3/03/2007 04:42:00 PM
3 Comments:
tube tying? YIKES! That's a scary thing to do. You are pretty brave!
Well, this post kind of floored me. I am not sure what to write. I am just going to pray for you, I know you may not believe but I do, so I will. I hope things get better and that the docs manage a better drug cocktail for you. It is quite possible that your children won't be bipolar, but I do understand your want in doing the tube tying thing. I know that I would not want to feel responsible for someone going through the obvious hell you sometimes go through.
Take care, oh and I sorta posted again. Pics, at least.
Take care, oh and I sorta posted again. Pics, at least.
i have my moments, I guess TDG.
VG: words are not expected, but greatly appreciated. Thanks for caring, my friend.
VG: words are not expected, but greatly appreciated. Thanks for caring, my friend.