Thursday, March 16, 2017
This isn't happy, it's just an update
I still journal everyday. I write a page.
I try to write about the accomplishments I have made during the day (cleaning, cooking, housework, reading, exercise, anything, really. I write about my mood, emotions, anyone I have come across of thoughts that are dominant that day.
I work... As much as I can. As limited as I am by the hours given by the place that employees me.
I want more hours, last year I worked enough that I was issued all 200 hours of vto and 40 hours of pto... Like a full-timer would earn if they worked enough hours. I work full-time without the benefits.
Asia has arthritis in her hips, legs and back. She has become a heat junkie. It helps her.
Dagger is a suck, snuggle bear. He's my baby. It's hard to believe he's 10 now.
I bought a new car. I don't actually like it. I just feel like I spent too much money and didn't get enough car.
My house doesn't feel like my home. It's impersonal and full of aged, broken pieces. Nothing that means anything, nothing that matters and nothing that I enjoy. It's just stuff and it's all bits and pieces.
There's bits and pieces of me scattered about. I don't even know who I really am or what I have to offer.
My life is merely existance... I live to survive and that's it. Survival, one day to the next. No future. No dreams, no goals. And nothing to offer.
I guess I need to work on that.
Dragonfly 3/16/2017 05:20:00 PM